Thursday, August 21, 2008

Fatty McButterpants


Look, I'm going to be pretty honest here: I'm chubby. I'm going to warn you now, so that the next time some of you out-of-towners lay eyes on me, you will remember that I've prepared you for Mrs. Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man. Paul tries to be nice and say, "You're not fat, you're pregnant". Boy, husbands don't get it sometimes, do they? That phrase does not make me feel better about myself. What we really want to hear is, "You're the most slender, beautiful pregnant woman I've seen so far in my entire 31 years of existence". That's more like it!
What's pretty bad is, at this point, I can't even do the elastic trick on my old jeans anymore, because I can't even do the zipper up. Nope. I'm wearing the gaucho pants full-time, people! I was also under the mistaken impression last week that I could wear a button-up shirt to work. I tried on 3 before giving up. Let's just say I've grown in more areas than one. This also includes, but is not limited to, my face, arms, bottom, and my ring finger, which was being deprived of circulation until Paul bought me a beautiful new sterling silver & cubic zirconia replacement at Claire's. I've got to hand it to Paul, though, he's watched me do some unpleasant things so far, and has even managed to clean up after me, so I can't complain.
Anyway, I just thought I'd share the joy that is pregnancy has been thus far. I know you're probably thinking I'm nuts, because I whined for the longest time about the fact that I desperately wanted to be pregnant, and now that that wish has come true, why should I be complaining? Well, it's still unpleasant, but I'm grateful nonetheless.
If you feel like sharing a funny pregnancy story (clumsiness, vomiting in inconvenient places, forgetting what your husband just said to you 20 seconds ago, etc...), or a craving you gave in to (chicken noodle soup + cottage cheese = crazy delicious), please share!!!

5 comments:

coco said...

How happy the family is!do you want to find your ideal mate to have a family,why not come to ***seekingbbw.com***you can find many Sexy, Curvy, Classy Women, open minded plus couples, hot big guys, also nice fat admirers, even some celebs.

Paul said...

Thanks for that awesome comment 'coco' but Anna has already found a nice fat (pregnancy) admirer!!!

Julie V. said...

Anna, how funny! You just wait, the fatness is only just beginning! Isn't it so sweet how these wonderful husbands like us curves and all?! Hang on to yours, he's a keeper for sure. Tom has always said he thinks I'm prettiest when I'm pregnant. Weird!

Dar, Ali, Edi, and Lukey said...

Well, as far as clumsiness goes...I only had 2 pairs of pants that fit me for the last 2 months and every day without fail I spilled food on them. Not even kidding. So I did more laundry while I was pregnant than any other time in my life. Have fun with that. You kind of start to feel like a clumsy pig...ugghh..

Carrie said...

Anna - I think you look slender, and besides - you're going to lose like 10 pounds all in one day, so - live it up :) My only good pregnancy story is that I kept forgetting that my belly was su HUGE and I'd hit it against the button that riases and lowers the projector screen in my classroom where I was teaching at least once a week... Someday soon you'll be able to see your toes again...and tie your shoes... andgo more than 10 minutes between bathroom visits... and wear all the button-up shirts you want...hang in there!!!